Notes on feeling overwhelmed

Rewinding back to last week for a moment… It’s Friday afternoon, the weekend is about to begin and I’m writing a long list of all the things I need to do. I panic; I know I have a busy weekend ahead and doing everything will be near on impossible. I’ve been here before. It’s a feeling I’ve been carrying with me for the past couple of months, so today I’m writing frankly about feeling overwhelmed and, hopefully, how I’m overcoming it. I’ve written a little about this before, with some helpful tips to help you through (note: I could do with re-reading this!).

Before I go on, I thought this quote I found on Pinterest was quite fitting –

Notes on feeling overwhelmed. Post from This Little Space of Mine

Since our holiday I’ve felt a burden, a need to blog, a need to work on Fred & Bell, a need to make our home as lovely as possible, a need to be able to not look at my phone every 5 seconds, a need to lay on the sofa, craft and binge on Gilmore Girls, a need to be with friends and family, a need to… well, the list goes on and on. As a result I’ve not really given my full attention to anything, meaning everything has felt half-arsed – blog content has been few and far between, our bathroom really needed a good clean and I miss the days of laying on the sofa and crafting. It’s been a vicious circle and in the last week (after a big cry) I feel like I’m starting to break away from it.

I don’t need to do anything. I can control this. No one else. No one is expecting me to do that long list of things and, certainly for Stu, he’d much rather I didn’t busy myself every second of the day. It’s something he noted when we first got together and it was almost a light bulb moment to hear him say it again at the weekend. I do keep myself busy (generally I like it that way), but it often means I don’t focus on what I really need in that precise moment. Be it a long hot bath, to cook a nice dinner or just be on my own. I forget it and get swallowed up in that list. When I mentioned to him about the shop not working and closing it, his response was to remind me that it’s meant to be fun and for me. Ah ha! Of course!

At the heart of this, I’m making life harder than it needs to be. I’m not blogging because I have to, or working on the shop because I need the money (though, hello, wedding to pay for)! I’m doing it because I love being creative, and I shouldn’t forget that. I avoid cleaning our house because I think I hate it; when I do tidy up and get stuck into spring cleaning I actually find myself enjoying it. Tidy house, tidy mind, I think the phrase might be. The fun of the shop was taken out by a need to release lots and lots of stickers and get absorbed by what everyone else around me is doing. Actually, what I need to do is remember me in all of this. What are the stickers I want to make and use? They’re the stickers I should be making.

I won’t get started on wedding planning; we’ve viewed venues that seem to think it’s OK to charge thousands and thousands and only give you the option to have a three to five course banquet with all the trimmings. What’s wrong with low key, one/two courses, cake and dancing? That’s what we want. I’ve already noted how easy it would be to lose sight of that… and we won’t be. Even if I lose my way, I know Stu won’t.

So that long list might still exist, it’s better on paper than in my head, but I’m going to try and keep a perspective on things. This is on my terms; I control this and I can work to my own pace when I’m ready to. I think that applies for anyone, anyone reading who feels that overwhelm, let’s remember you and what you need. That’s how we get the best from ourselves. Listening to Gretchen Rubin’s podcast she talks about treating ourselves as children; what do we need? Are we tired? Go to bed. Are we hungry? Eat something. As adults it’s so easy to ignore those basic needs; we forget to stop and think about what we need.

So I’m here and I plan to keep being here. Sometimes that overwhelm might take over, but I’ll get control and all will be OK. I won’t beat myself up for missing Twitter chats, or not using Instagram stories, or not selling that particular sticker set. I’ll keep being me and do what I can, when I’m comfortable.

If you’re reading this and have been feeling that overwhelm of life too – perhaps work, relationships, whatever the case may be… you’re not alone.

Thanks for reading,

Leanne x

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Photo credit: Jen B. Peters

8 Comments on Notes on feeling overwhelmed

  1. Anna International
    13/10/2016 at 1:16 pm (1 year ago)

    Hello Me! Literally, could have written this myself. We got married in August, and since then I have spiralled down into a vortex of ‘things I need to do’ but actually, do I? I sometimes never take a step back. Sadly, quite a lot of them I do, but others, I need to stop feeling guilty about and let go. And look forward to having an actual bath again so I can have a long hot one! (Bathroom reno in full swing).
    I notice you’re in Hampshire – I had exactly the wedding you are after…at my parents’ house which also happens to be for hire as a wedding venue, in case you want to look! It is beautiful, and can be as high/low key as you want. If you just want teepees in the field and a big bonfire that would be fine by them. If you make an enquiry tell them I sent you! πŸ™‚ xx

    • Leanne Beale
      13/10/2016 at 5:10 pm (1 year ago)

      Thanks, I’ll look it up! Taking a step back is oh so important. πŸ™‚ Hope things improve soon x

  2. Louise
    13/10/2016 at 4:45 pm (1 year ago)

    Ahhh sending you all the love! I know this feeling all too well. I love having a to-do list, yet when my to-do list is longer than my arm it does make you wonder. I reckon if I burnt that list and tried to re-write it, only half of the items would re-appear. It’s so, so easy to get caught up in the ‘should be doings’ sometimes! It makes me incredibly tired when I get overwhelmed like this – which is clearly my body crying out for rest. Yet still we carry on, haha. Hope you get everything in check soon πŸ™‚

    • Leanne Beale
      13/10/2016 at 5:05 pm (1 year ago)

      So true! I reckon if I burnt my list I wouldn’t remember them either! I do think my body is calling out for a rest, it’s been a loooooong year! This week has definitely been better, thank you. Hope you’re well xx

  3. Louise
    13/10/2016 at 4:47 pm (1 year ago)

    Also Stu sounds tremendous – he’s a keeper πŸ˜‰

    • Leanne Beale
      13/10/2016 at 5:04 pm (1 year ago)

      That he is. πŸ˜‰

  4. Jess
    14/10/2016 at 9:31 am (1 year ago)

    OMG yes i feel you! I’ve recently felt overwhelmed, at work and at home. I avoid doing things such as cleaning, running errands, ringing the gas company, going to the post office and i have no idea why! its just the thought of it and feeling a pressure to do these things.
    Good luck with the wedding, we wanted the same as you, simple dinner good music and lots of drink and we kept this in mind all the way through so we didn’t lose our way and have our head turned by fancy venues! Have fun, its sad when its all over!

    • Leanne Beale
      14/10/2016 at 9:54 am (1 year ago)

      Thanks Jess, I want to enjoy our engagement as much as I can. πŸ™‚ I can so relate to avoiding it – if we just did it, we’d feel better – but sometimes it’s too hard. Gretchen also talks in her podcast about a power hour of tasks and I might start trying that. x